Chapter 2 - The Words She Wanted

The card said:

DADDY GETS ANGRY WHEN HE DRINKS.

DADDY LEAVES ME ALONE.

I AM SCARED OF DADDY.

I WANT VANESSA TO TAKE CARE OF ME.

For a few seconds, I could only hear Ella crying against my chest.

"You wrote this?" I asked.

Vanessa lifted both hands. "It was for counseling."

"Counseling?"

"Ella has been acting out. I was trying to help her explain her feelings."

Ella pulled back. "Those aren't my feelings."

Vanessa's voice sharpened. "Sweetheart, we talked about this."

"No, you talked."

That stopped me.

Ella was not a confrontational child. She apologized when someone else bumped into her. Hearing steel in her voice scared me more than the card.

I took out my phone and photographed it.

Vanessa stepped forward. "Ethan, give me that. You're turning this into something ugly."

"Something ugly happened before I walked in."

"You have been gone nine days. You don't know what I have dealt with."

I looked at Ella. "Has Vanessa made you eat from Milo's bowl before?"

Her eyes dropped.

Vanessa snapped, "Do not interrogate her."

I ignored her. "Ella?"

"Not this bowl," she whispered.

My stomach went cold.

"What does that mean?"

She pointed toward the pantry.

Vanessa moved between us. "She is overtired."

I stood, still holding Ella. "Move."

"Ethan."

"Move."

For the first time since I had known her, Vanessa looked afraid of me - not because I raised my voice. I did not. Because I had stopped listening to hers.

I carried Ella to the pantry and opened the door.

At first, I saw nothing unusual.

Then Ella pointed to the bottom shelf.

Behind a stack of paper towels sat a small blue plastic bowl.

On the side, someone had written one word with a permanent marker.

ELLA.

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I stared at it.

Then my daughter whispered, "That's the one she usually makes me use."