Chapter 15 - THE RECORDINGS ELEANOR ERASED
Alexander stared at the email for a long time.
“Did you destroy them?”
It was the first time I had seen her look less like Eleanor Sterling and more like an old woman who had made a terrible choice.
“Some.”
Alexander’s voice shook. “Why?”
“Because Lydia was dying and afraid. She said things that would have undermined you.”
“Me?”
“She was angry about your travel.”
“She had the right.”
“She accused me of controlling you.”
“Was she wrong?”
“Eleanor, if you are listening, I know you love Noah.”
“But sometimes you love people like you are managing an emergency.”
Lydia continued. “You cannot prevent every wound. You cannot arrange every relationship. You cannot select a mother for him like you select a board member.”
Then: “And Alexander, if you let your mother run your grief for you, she will run Noah’s too.”
Eleanor whispered, “She hated me at the end.”
“No,” I said before I could stop myself.
I swallowed. “She sounded like she knew you.”
“My husband died when Alexander was twelve.”
Alexander looked at her. “I know.”
“I had no idea how to raise you alone.”
“So you controlled everything.”
“Yes.”
“I made schedules. Schools. Friends. Tutors. Internships. I told myself if nothing was left to chance, nothing could leave me again.”
Then she looked toward the ceiling, where Noah slept.
“I did it to him too.”
Then Eleanor said, “I told Caroline to remove Emma.”
Alexander went still. “Remove how?”
“Fire her. Damage the reference if necessary. Nothing else.”
“The threat?”
“I did not order it.”
“The car?”
“No.”
“St. Alden?”
“Yes.”
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“And I knew Noah would think Emma abandoned him.”
That confession broke something in the room.
