Chapter 18 - VANESSA'S LAST VISIT
Vanessa asked to see Emma.
I said no.
She asked again through her attorney.
Still no.
Then she asked to see me.
That I agreed to.
Public building.
Two lawyers present.
No child.
"I know you hate me."
"I don't spend enough time thinking about you to hate you."
She looked down.
"I loved you."
"Maybe."
Her eyes filled.
"You don't believe that?"
"I believe people can feel love and still choose themselves over everyone else."
She nodded slowly.
"I kept telling myself I could protect Emma from the worst parts."
"You were the worst part she knew."
She pushed a folded paper across the table.
"What is it?"
"A list of phrases Owen trained us to use."
I opened it.
She's overtired.
She's adjusting.
She's jealous.
She's confused.
She's testing boundaries.
She has a vivid imagination.
Every sentence had come out of my mouth at some point.
I felt sick.
Vanessa whispered, "He taught us to give parents explanations they already wanted."
I folded the paper.
"Why did you lock her in the laundry room?"
Vanessa stared at the table.
"She kept saying Claire was still her mommy."
"So?"
"I was angry."
No protocol.
No Owen.
No theory.
Just cruelty.
That mattered.
"Thank you for finally telling the truth."
She started crying.
"Will Emma ever know I was sorry?"
"Maybe when she's old enough to ask."
"Can you tell her I loved her?"
I stood.
"No."
Vanessa looked up.
"I'll tell her you were responsible for hurting her and that adults are responsible for fixing what they break."
May you like
I walked out.
For the first time since dinner night, I felt nothing chasing me.
