Chapter 14 - What Love Was Not
Adrian had once loved being seen with Isabella.
That was not the same as loving Isabella.
He admitted that to her one night.
They sat beside Julian’s sleeping bed.
“I loved what your beauty said about me.”
Isabella looked at him.
“That’s ugly.”
“Yes.”
“Keep going.”
He smiled sadly.
“When your body changed, I thought I had lost something that belonged to me.”
“I never belonged to you.”
“I know that now.”
She believed him.
Believing was not the same as forgetting.
Adrian continued.
“When I saw the scar at the ball, I understood how much pain existed while I was complaining about appearances.”
Isabella looked at Julian.
“You knew I was in pain.”
“Yes.”
“You just didn’t think it mattered enough.”
He flinched.
“Yes.”
That was the deepest wound.
Not ignorance.
Priority.
Over the following months, Adrian stopped asking Isabella when she would forgive him.
He stopped turning his guilt into another task for her.
Instead he did the smaller work.
He attended medical reform meetings.
He corrected nobles who joked about women’s bodies.
He apologized publicly when it cost him pride.
And he left Isabella alone when she asked.
One afternoon Helena requested a private visit.
Isabella said yes.
Not because Helena deserved it.
Because Isabella was curious.
Helena entered older.
Smaller somehow.
Still straight-backed.
She looked at Isabella’s fuller body.
Then at her face.
“You won.”
Isabella almost laughed.
“This was never a game.”
“It always is.”
“That may be your problem.”
Helena’s jaw tightened.
“You think Adrian has changed?”
“Yes.”
“You trust him?”
“Sometimes.”
That answer unsettled Helena more than a romantic one would have.
Before leaving, Helena asked:
“Do you forgive me?”
Isabella answered:
“No.”
Helena looked wounded.
Isabella continued:
“But I don’t need to punish you every morning either.”
Helena left without another word.
Adrian waited in the hall.
“How was it?”
Isabella closed the door.
“Short.”
He nodded.
May you like
Then she smiled.
“Exactly the right length.”
